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Where will you find the courage? π― Wednesday Win
Published 3 months agoΒ β’Β 4 min read
You canβt achieve much without self-confidence, but self-confidence isnβt a switch you just turn on. It requires taking action, adjusting to results, and building experience. The commitment to start requires a spark of courage, but deep confidence comes from repeatedly tackling challenges and finding ways through to good results.
Sometimes we need some help to get in the necessary reps that build confidence to achieve more. The simple tools below can reduce the barriers to starting and shorten the time to achieve more positive results.
Let's dig in:
1. Don't fear the fear
When under stress it's natural to want to suppress thinking about what's causing anxiety. But moments of fear or worry can be best dealt with directly. Recognize that there are bound to more solutions options than are obvious at first.
Try to find a bit of distance from the concerns and look at the challenge as if you were solving someone else's problem. What would you recommend for investigation, planning, and response? Separate as much of the emotion from the problem as possible in order to make a solid plan.
In The Courage Habit, Kate Swoboda writes how confronting your fears enables you to pursue the future with freedom. The emotion of fear takes up so much mental space that you don't have room to be your best self.
We often struggle the most with new challenges, but you can always embrace the fact that this is where the growth happens. Building resilience, learning new skills, and overcoming difficulties.
Surprise, stress, and fear for the future are natural feelings when you are pushing into new capabilities and achievements
Don't avoid the challenges, but instead try to evaluate them with some detachment
Make a plan and take comfort in that to reduce the unhelpful side of fear and stress
Pursue your plan and adjust as you learn and grow
2. Be Confident in the moment
A great way to encourage your confidence, is to take the actions that represent such feelings in ourselves and others. How you stand, how you speak, and how you respond to situations all impact the internal feelings of courage and confidence.
In the same way that smiling can generate feelings of happiness as well as represent those internal feelings, good posture, eye contact, and active listening with thoughtful responses will all improve your own sense of confidence as well as project it to others.
You don't wait to feel confident and then put it into action. Instead, you start with the actions and the feelings will back those actions.
Embrace positive body language starting with good posture
Take a few deep breaths to help focus your mind and calm your body
Be present in the moment; listen carefully and participate fully
Embrace the "five second rule" and force yourself to start something challenging in less than five seconds from recognizing the opportunity
The 5 Second Rule: Transform your Life, Work, and Confidence with Everyday Courage by Mel Robbins
3. Focus on values
To feel confident and comfortable in our plans, we must be acting in concert with our values. We can't succeed if part of our subconscious mind doesn't want that outcome.
Your plans, your work, and your actions will always feel like painful burdens if they aren't aligned with how you see your life's purpose. And if you don't have a sense of your own internal priorities, these roadblocks may seem to come out of nowhere to disrupt your goals.
Get clear on your most important priorities and then build your goals from there. Confidence will naturally follow.
We aren't confident when we are trying to act in conflict with our values
Let your values drive your goals and not the other way around
Use your commitment to your Why to drive your belief in your success
4. Be yourself
One of the greatest gifts of wisdom is that there is room in this world for your unique personality, perspective, and approach. In other words, you can be yourself.
One of the top reasons entrepreneurs pursue the creation of a business is so they can bring their whole self to work everyday and not be subject to the rules and limitations that others place on them.
I'm not suggesting you embrace your most anti-social impulses and let go of reasonable community behavior, but finding environments where you can bring your full set of ideas, creativity, work habits, and the rest of your personality will be one that supports your best achievements.
Confidence is easiest when you are comfortable in your own skin
Focus more on your thoughts than any concern over what others may think of you (hint: mostly, no one else really cares)
Don't suppress your unique abilities and insights in the pursuit of conformity
Create a space that works for you if you can't find it elsewhere
The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life by Mark Manson
Action Summary
Building up the confidence necessary to grow and achieve at a high level takes an understanding of yourself. Be willing to identify and prioritize your values. Writing is a great way to explore your own thinking.
Leverage these skills to help you build and maintain the courage to move forward and take massive action.
Recognize fear is natural. Don't ignore it: examine it, process it, and let it go
Be confident in the moment
Focus on your values and let them drive your goals
Be comfortable being you
The Courage Habit: How to Accept Your Fears, Release the Past, and Live Your Courageous Life by Kate Swoboda
What do you think? What are the keys to building self-confidence in your experience? Reply to this email and let me know.
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